You know how soldiers who've lost limbs in battle often experience feeling a phantom limb by feeling pain or some sort of sensation in (or I guess where) the missing limb would have been?
Well the same thing happens to me except that it's not the phantom limb syndrome, it's the phantom sunglasses on my head syndrome.
I wonder if I can retire with, or at least claim it as, a disability.
It causes me to put my hand up to my temples repeatedly - like 10 times in an hour.
That's pretty disabling.
You know times are tough when you're so busy at work you run into the ladies room and don't have time to turn on the lights (because you know how long it takes to flip a switch - right?).
But then you're in the stall and you realize you may have made an error in judgement because it's raining out and consequently the bathroom's really, really, dark and you realize that life's a crap shoot.
song: Somebody Turned on the Light • artist: Arlo Guthrie
Sure I hung up the car on the big rock at the end of my driveway this morning, right in front of my neighbor.
But I was trying to turn up the radio because the show tunes station was playing Willkommen from Cabaret. The Joel Gray version.
You would have done the same thing.
Having four sons is like living in a zoo.
Although I've never lived in a zoo my guess is that they are noisy and dirty and that there's a lot of mud slinging.
But wait, that's not fair to zoos.
The zoos I've been to are all actually clean and spacious and beautifully landscaped and the animals all get along.
Having four sons is like living in a third-rate, soon to be uncredited, zoo.
Yeah. That's more like it.